Most everyone in Ohio knows that no one in a family is left unaffected by a divorce. How a divorcing couple handles the divorce will determine how the rest of the family reacts. Making an effort to cooperate and have a collaborative divorce can help a couple make their divorce easier on the whole family. Children will be affected by the divorce but it is important to remember their needs during what may be an extremely difficult and emotional time for you.

A collaborative divorce uses counselors, financial advisers and attorneys to help a couple come to an amicable divorce settlement. For this process to work at its best, a couple needs to be able to put aside their differences in order to focus on coming to an agreement that will best benefit the whole family. One way for a couple to do this may be to realize that they will always be connected through their children. This may help remind a couple that the divorce only dissolves their union, not the family and that they will always be the parents of their children.

As parents move through the collaborative process, decisions need to be made that will make the transition from a two-parent household to two one-parent households as smooth as possible. First, all of the issues that should be between the parents need to stay between the parents. Children should not be couriering messages between their parents as they are ill-equipped to handle adult problems. It is important to remember intergenerational boundaries when communicating with the other parent in front of the children.

One of the goals of a collaborative divorce is to make the transitions a divorce requires more amicable not only for the parents, but also less disruptive for the children. Whatever issues brought an couple to divorce don't necessarily need to survive the divorce process. Just because the marriage ended, it does not automatically mean that the divorce has to be contentious. Couples who are determined to work together not only for themselves but for their children may end up happily divorced even though they may not have been happily married.

Source: The Huffington Post, "Parenting Tips While Going Through Divorce," Micki McWade, Oct. 30, 2012